i was so bored past few days without my pc...watched few movies....and some of the lines in the show is quite nice... will share wif u all...if i managed to recall it la...

Luck is when preparation meets opportunity.You gotta prepare for the life you want.

How true it is,isn't it? Often people says they missed the opportunity.Or some would say i don;t have the chance to.... we have to know what we want in life. we have to prepare ourselve for it. and when the opportunity comes to you.SNAP! there you go... but if we aren't prepared,even when opportunity comes,its pointless..... for me,i don't believe in luck. i believe in seizing opportunities and believing in myself.

yippee....i think technology is really amazing...alrite i am indeed a PC idiot. in terms of hardware.i cant even figure out palm....urgh...

anyway,i brought my laptop home today.hoping tat i can try to connect to the modem i am using at home.yeah! i did it....and its juz so simple...juz plug in onli....maybe becoz my laptop is new. aiyah dunno la...when i click the internet explorer and it start surfin...i was so damn happy..haha...though my games are in my PC,at least i can still surf rite?

my fren detected the problem of my PC...not the graphic card.Damn. its the motherboard....haiz.... $$$ fly again. then i "shun bian" ask him add ram. i only know ram can make computer faster. we actually conversed in SMSes. then he asked:"add how much?" i went like...huh? add how much??? wa lau...made me feel so stupid... anyway,i am glad it wont affect my data in my computer...sibeh happy...

my home pc is down.....sobz....i miss it so much...coz i cant play my games...i cant go online....i cant listen to my songs.....i cant see my lovely pictures.....

boo hoo hoo......sobz sobz..... *sniff sniff

sorry....i wronged u...

so lost for words.....

what is marriage to ppl nowadays? juz a companion? or someone whom u really love and treasure?or juz a vow wif a piece of paper?

it takes a lifetime to build a friendship, but only a second to destroy it.

i want to watch SHREK 3.......


i also want to watch Pirates of the Carribean....


who can bring me go?

A girl pregnant... An eighteen-year-old girl tells her Mom that she hasmissed her period for two months. Very worried, the mother goes to thedrugstore and buys a pregnancy kit. The test result shows that the girlis pregnant. Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother says, "Who was the pigthat did this to you? I want to know!" The girl picks up the phone and makesa call. Half an hour later a Ferrari stops in front of their house; a matureand distinguished man with grey hair, impeccably dressed in a veryexpensive suit, steps out of the car And enters the house. He sits inthe living room with the father, the mother and the girl, and tells them,
"Good morning, your daughter has informed me of the problem. However, I can'tmarry her because of my personal family situation, but I'll take charge."
"If a girl is born, I will bequeath her two retail stores, a townhouse, abeach villa and a $2,000,000 bank account. If a boy is born, my legacywill be a couple of factories and a $5,000,000 bank account.
If it istwins, a factory and $2,000,000 each.
However, if there is a miscarriage, what do you suggest I do ?"
At this point, the father, who had remained silent, places a hand firmly on the man's shoulder and tells him;
"Then you try again...!"

We're always making choices. How we will use our time, how we're going to get to our destination, what we're going to have for lunch, what colours should be used for our logo, what proposal should be dumped and which one should be taken up. Every step that we take presents us with an option of "Yes" or "No".
All these decisions, or in the case of some of us, in-decision, affects our happiness. How consciously do we make our choices? What happens when we can't make a definite "Yes" or "No" is that we become stuck in the wilderness of "Maybe" land. When we spend too much time in this place, we allow others to decide how our lives should be led. Here we have no hope for fulfillment because when things go well, we can't take the credit. And when things go awry, we blame ourselves for trusting the judgement of another.

Imagine that your partner or friend prefers to watch a particular movie and you'd really like to see another but you don't say anything. You give your partner or friend a weak "maybe", "it doesn't matter" or a reluctant "oh ok?" Later, you feel resentful and angry because this always seems to happen and you "never get to see the movie that you want to see."

Sometimes we justify this by believing that we don't assert ourselves because we are easy-going or generous. If this is the case, then why do we subsequently feel lousy and on the losing end?

Now, asserting yourself doesn't mean being demanding or unreasonable. By all means, empower yourself by expressing your feelings clearly, but be ready to negotiate or occasionally give in or come to a compromise. The important thing is simply to make your feelings known. Hiding behind a mask of indifference creates a lot of inner tension which may explode in the future.

It's very important to empower yourself to make conscious choices to create the relationships and life that you want. A lot of people feel anger and resentment toward others but what they're actually feeling is resentment towards themselves for not having the courage to go for what they really want.

Whenever you're faced with a decision, take the time to go within yourself and ask yourself what you really want. Is it true that it doesn't matter? Is it something you can take lightly? Or something you feel strongly about? When you evaluate your options consciously and express your feelings clearly, you'll feel more empowered, and as a result, move confidently toward creating the kind of relationships and life that you want.

Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu famously said "The journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step."

Indeed, as with everything in life, we learn by taking one step at a time. We may fall down, but we get back up and take another step. That is the only way to learn and to continue growing. In such a fast-paced modern world, however, some of us forget that principle. We try to run, inevitably trip and take a very painful tumble.

Some of us put off this journey of self-discovery and empowerment; we model ourselves against other people, we learn to suppress our genuine selves in order to fit in, we are terrified perhaps that if we opened ourselves up and looked in, we might not like what we see.

Well, like it or not, that's a risk we all have to face. With high risk comes high yield or a big loss. Unfortunately, most of us prefer to live in denial. We go about thinking the best or the worst of ourselves, until one day we fall down into the mud and we actually have to face ourselves. Who are you? What makes you special? What makes you YOU?

There are four basic steps that we need to follow on our journey.

Step One - Be prepared to look at yourself and admit that every bruise, every fall is all your doing.

Step Two - Surrender, let go of the idea that you should control every event, and have faith that everything you ask will be given to you.

Step Three - Sit down every day and write. Start a journal and every day record the events of the day, paying attention to your reactions to events, experiences, and people. Classify your reactions for what they were, whether they be anger, jealousy, resentment, joy, love, or self-pity.

By identifying your reaction and classifying it as your reaction to an event, you will come to see why you are acting as you are. Why you would react angrily in a situation that does not require anger; your own feelings and responsibilities.

Step Four - Ask why. "Why do I become angry in that situation?", "What is my deeper hidden feeling about this type of situation?". Start recording your "why's" in a separate book. In this book, record all your experiences and incidents of your past and how you reacted to them.

You will soon start to see that your current reactions can be traced back to past situations. Sooner or later we must admit that all our reactions are a result of our desires, expectations and our ego. Once you can trace your weaknesses, you will find ways to deal with them in a more constructive and positive way.

take a look at the following....i kinda like the penguin series....cute...

tis pic cute rite???

thank you all for showing ur concern to me...and sorry if i had caused some worries to u....

esp. to QW,sorry to scare u...i realli dun mean anything....tell peter paiseh for breaking the glass....

in the end,i still gt to put on a smile n move on....

when can i ever find happiness???

happiness doesnt mean having a loved one/partner. i just want to find my own happiness....true happiness within myself....

May 17,1998.....a day i will never forget.

the day tat caused my life to capsize....the day that made my life upside down...why is it so difficult...

start from the hardest thing- that is to forgive yourself

In life,we are always given choices.it is the choices we make that make ourself.

I give myself another 5 years....

5 years to change everything.....since i already wait so long already....wads another 5 years?

remember??? time will tell.....

You are Purple Panther who tends to be precautious, and unlike your gentle atmosphere you are strong-minded and courageous woman. (true...)

You don't listen to other people, and carry out with your opinion.(not all the times...most of the times..keke)

Although you don't possess coolness to see things objectively, and analyze subjects intelligently, you have great natural instinct.You have flexible thoughts, and can lead life with perseverance. You will not miss opportunity. You can adapt and sort out difficulties that you come across.You can face the things that interest you with unusual effort and spirit, but you will not even try to see those things that you are not interested.(true....hmmm)

You seem like a gentle and kind person, but really you possess lots of problems and are always struggling within yourself.People are unable to understand your complicated feelings. This increase your problems further. (very true!!except that i AM also gentle and kind)

You are a person with great dreams and are active and possess straight forward baldness. You can show this talent in your career.(true...if only i want to...)

You will not be able to stay quietly at home as a housewife. (erm....not really lei...i would like to be a housewife....maybe the part of staying QUIETLY....errr...dun think so la.. )

for the past week,lots of things came to my mind. as mentioned,it;s time to let go....Many asked me wad it is all about. well,in short,time to let go of the past....call me stupid or wadever. perhaps the more i "cling" on,the more HE will feel that someone will always be there should anything happen.in other words,perhaps take things for granted. On the other hand,if it's becoz of a fear that something will happen to one's partner that he or she do not wana create "disputes" or breakup,then shall i do the same? What about the scars on those hands???what about the scars in the heart???

I wished my heart was like the sand on the beach that can be washed off easily...this time round i am really determined to let it go...i know my life isnt the same as before...yes i indulge in drinking n stuff.at least i am controlling.But it aint easy to act so strong in front of all the people. And often when i chat wif other in pub,i realise i am not the only one. i really emphathise with them...yes,i often hide my feelings...but i know if i let off my feelings n thoughts,its gonna be disastrous....

Yet i wana complain...its tiring not being myself...i know i will overcome it...just got to watch my temper. my priority will be work first from now on...

I hope i am sensible enough to go thru this.....it's juz the beginning...

it's time to let go.....

i got the urge to go for tattoo......

what a Sunday! i reached home last nite...erm...no morning at 5+ am. couldnt sleep til 6+. i actually missed my alarm at 830 am. but luckily i woke up at 9am. Had a appointment for facial then another appointment for body massage together with my cousin. Actually i suggested the massage but she also wan the facial,so i agreed lor.
I was late due to a traffic jam. There's a major accident near my place....walau...my stupid cousin hor...appointment 10am. warned ment to be late....maybe she also know i will go chiong on Saturday....end up lei?? i called at 1010am....she still at home sleeping lor....liew.... after our facial ended at 130,we went for the massage....SHIOK sia!!!! really SHIOK...though pain...and now abit aching....

After that the 2 of us went COCA steamboat...at 345pm!! its our breakfast/lunch/dinner. the restaurant empty lor...coz where gt ppl eat dinner at tat time one??? haha...we like 2 queen in the restaurant...we ended dinner at 6pm. went to buy mangosteens n durian....then went home....

Nice relaxing Sunday....oh ya...i love mangosteens!

George Bernard Shaw said, “People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don’t believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and if they can’t find them, they make them.”

Well, it’s pretty apparent, isn’t it? And every person who discovered this believed (for a while) that he was the first one to work it out. We become what we think about.Conversely, the person who has no goal, who doesn’t know where he’s going, and whose thoughts must therefore be thoughts of confusion, anxiety and worry – his life becomes one of frustration, fear, anxiety and worry. And if he thinks about nothing… he becomes nothing.

Why do we become what we think about? Well, as illustrated in a book, here it goes...

Suppose a farmer has some land, and it’s good, fertile land. The land gives the farmer a choice; he may plant in that land whatever he chooses. The land doesn’t care. It’s up to the farmer to make the decision.
We’re comparing the human mind with the land because the mind, like the land, doesn’t care what you plant in it. It will return what you plant, but it doesn’t care what you plant.

Now, let’s say that the farmer has two seeds in his hand- one is a seed of corn, the other is nightshade, a deadly poison. He digs two little holes in the earth and he plants both seeds-one corn, the other nightshade. He covers up the holes, waters and takes care of the land…and what will happen? Invariably, the land will return what was planted. As it’s written in the Bible,

“As ye sow, so shall ye reap.”

Remember the land doesn’t care. It will return poison in just as wonderful abundance as it will corn. So up come the two plants - one corn, one poison.

The human mind is far more fertile, far more incredible and mysterious than the land, but it works the same way. It doesn’t care what we plant… success...or failure. A concrete, worthwhile goal…or confusion, misunderstanding, fear, anxiety and so on. But what we plant it must return to us.

You see, the human mind is the last great unexplored continent on earth. It contains riches beyond our wildest dreams. It will return anything we want to plant.

So Dream what you want to dream; go where you want to go; be what you want to be, because you have only one life and one chance to do all the things you want to do.

All the best to all out there.Follow your dreams!

Juz came back from catching up wif Jess n adele....Nice dinner @ Grapevine. and wonderful fondue @ Haagan Daaz. Yum yum.... of coz the best part was their companion with all the updates on each other lives and the nonsense by Jess apparently.

Was sharing about our love life. About how one is so used to be attached that they need some one to rely on VS one who is single and is more independent. I guess both has its own point. I just felt that at different point and angles, we see things differently. Perhaps one is just used to having someone around that it became a part of life. Its normal. really. But when you feel that HE's not the guy you want to be with, dont juz cling onto the relationship for the fear of loneliness and emptiness. Dont forget you still have ur family and friends with you.

Be with someone whom you feel you can rely on and spend the whole life with. And not becoz it became a habit to be with the guy that the relationship gets dragged on. I do envy couples who is madly in love. So do you gals envy me for being able to take things so easy.

I'm not taking easy actually. Jus that looking back my past,i've seen and been with a number of guys who are morons.I meant morons. They have their nice side too. Jus that i dun see any future with them. And most importantly,i guess i still cant take my ex off my mind. It may be puppy love. But its the best feeling i ever had. Perhaps i wanna blame him for treating me too nice. Too nice that i am always comparing with other guys. I mean i dun compare him in front of other guys directly. it juz goes in my mind.

Know wad? Ever since i broke off in 1998 with HIM, i couldnt bring myself to accept another guy. I know i am not that great looking or wad. and i shouldnt be expecting for more. BUT i guess i have confidence in my inner beauty and character. For this i will look for someone who accept me for who i am. But so sad, i jus couldn;t accept anyone then. Nice guys that i missed(cuo guo) was

1. CM - nice guy.even til nw. it was so sweet of u then. will not forget how "cute" of you to think of that stupid excuse to ask me go clubroom wif u to get a stupid umbrella. And on the way you juz grab my hand outside the tutorial rooms @LT 12. keke....that time i still "gong gong". but i knew i "shun" u off. Sorry abt it. So stupid of me then....actually isnt my fault also la. U didnt tell me abt it also. and it was later about 2-3 years later i heard from seniors that u liked me. The whole club knew abt it except me. and how stupid i was to msg u tat time to ask u abt whether its true or nt...keke... glad we are still friends. and yup,we'll always be friends. I;m sure u;ll find ur loved one soon.

2. WJ - cute guy.sweet.always trying to make u happy. Glad that you found your lifetime partner and settled down already. All the best wor! and be guai guai ah....

3. Sheng - a guy that diverted my heartbreak. matured yet childish. we get along so well as we are in the same shit. both of us cant get over past relationship. and i think we juz need someone to be with tats all. I know its hard for you to get over ur 7 year relationship. I was so happy u managed to contact me after all these years. At the same time,i felt sad. Will you stop torturing yourself? I knew from the way u sound,theres something wrong. U're always making me worried yet i cant do anything. anyway,never forget how i helped you do ur project in poly then hor! Business student helping engineering student do project! kaoz!

Above 3 are the nice guys that i ....hmm...cant find the word. I didnt regret then. jus glad we are all still keepin in contact as friends.still able to share problems n laughter wif each other.
Oh ya here comes the morons that i was attached with. I mean yes...there were good times....but all didnt end up the right way...

Moron 1 - J.
He came by in such weird coincidence. he was my ICQ fren. He was also someone in my HP list. He was my Sec schmate BF then! apparently both were facing some problems. so my schmate approached me for help 1 day as she realised i was in his ICQ list. but then i didnt know that he was the same guy as in my HP list. and worse still,we met by accident on the street on 1 of the days. and tat changed everything. he was different as described from my schmate and slowly i felt that he wasnt a bad guy after all. and somehow we gt attached. thats was in 2001.it was much of feel but more of companion. But guilty conscience came to me and i decide nt to go on. After tat i found out that hes a kind of playboy who is constantly looking out for gals to have fun tats all. Thank goodness i made the right choice.Now is keeping as a mutual fren.

Moron 2. Mr Friday-D.
Hes one angel before we were together. Can still remember that time i juz started working....he would pick me off work everyday. That time only 20. how nice to have a guy to pick u up in a car after work rite???? He touched my heart by the little things he did for me. how he celebrated my birthday @ tis special place. I told myself to let go of the past and give it a try. yup. we gt attached. But things changed. he treated me so differently. and guess wad? we onli get to meet on every Friday. Its either dinner or movie. I didnt probe him on why.Coz i wasnt bothered either. To me he is Mr Friday.Someone whom i can go out on a Friday.This went on for a year plus to a point i decide that its nt getting us anywhere. and its such a waste of time. dunno where the heck he is nw.Oh ya....after 1 yr wif him,i realised he had 2 names. HECK! i mean i didnt bother...but still....y? it jus so happen i flip his wallet n realised it was a different name. F***

Moron 3. D.
Handsome cute guy. Such a weird situation that we both lied about our identity. different names. it was a short(1-2 mth) relationship. coz i felt uncomfortable lying abt myself. and how i was shocked that he also lied. Anyway he left me for a gal who is rich. wat the heck! anyway nw we onli contact if theres any business dealings.

Moron 4. A.
This is one guy which made me wake up. wake up to my sense. A guy which showed me how cruel the world is. How sad a woman's life can be. Knew him thru my fren. He was my fren's supervisor. he wasnt the charming handsome guy. but theres juz this kinda of attraction to him. Perhaps its been so long that i can "click" with a guy. I mean previious moron guys,i wasnt really into it.jus wanted a companion. but wif A,i felt so comfortable wif him ard. perhaps tat point of time i was feeling down due to work. and it was a transition time for my job switch.Things went on jus so fine btw us. and i was thinking....finally i could find myself accepting another guy. However we kept our relationship discrete. Until 1 day,i heard from my fren that he's getting married. Not to me. But to another gal. Wad a fool i was! I had the urged to tell his fiance then. but i didnt. he wanted our relationship to go on. I thought for some time and decided not to. Main reason is that i really pity his wife. I didnt ruin their marriage. its complicated..... How morons guys can be!

A is the last since then. Why is society in such a manner? I didnt shed any tears coz I once told "HIM" that i will never shed any tears no more. I'm changing my statement. My tears will only be for HIM.even til nw...

Back to our discussion,i guess we each have someone deep in our hearts which perhaps had hurt us so much. so much so that we jus wanted someone to be by our side. Wouldnt say there isnt any feelings. But its more of a companion. But really,hearing the problems faced by you guys,i just feel that you got to make up your mind. Both felt that ur partner is not the ONE.yet at the same time,you are so afraid to let go too. Comon gals,find ur happiness! It's a lifetime thing to consider and y drag on when u know they are not the ONE???

Remember,you still got the luvable me!keke....Look @ Ms ChXXX. she's happy with who she is rite nw...after leaving the jerk tat hurt her so badly. I;m sure you 2 will find the ONE too..eh..nono...we 3. haha...

Jerks and morons do exist...almost everywhere....but hey...we BITCHES rules!!!

Have you wonder what happiness meant to you???

Each of us lead a different life. Different character. different lifestyle. different thinking. different job. but i guess ultimately, being happy is one of the most important thing in life. Perhaps a sweet meant happiness to a 3 year old kid. Perhaps being able to spend time with your family and loved ones meant happiness. Perhaps seeing own child grow up meant happiness to parents. So whats yours?

Happiness is not a destination. It's a method of life. It's how you create it. No matter how high your pay is,job satisfaction will not be achieved if you ain;t happy. Pleasure in job puts perfection to the job. Agree?

Often,we will face some obstacles in life.Try thinking differently in times of difficulty and also OPTIMISM. Why embark ourselves on such a difficult job/journey???One way to happiness is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will. Things that is within our control,we can change it then. Falling down is not a SIN,but not getting up is.

Always share your dreams and goals with others. I always believe that each and everyone of us have the potential to succeed. Just that we did not unleash the power within us yet. What we need to do is to believe in ourself. Combining the elements of BELIEVE and PERSISTENCE,never underestimate one’s potential and power.

All the best to everyone out there!

I went to my new office at Singpost.was looking forward to it....but when i reached there,disappointment filled me,followed by sadness. I was really upset over it. I knew it would be small....but its really too small to be true. or perhaps its becoz of the layout of the room that made me uncomfortable. And when i visited the others' room,i felt so sad. its really upsetting to work in that space. I guess i have no right to say anything then.

Look for 1 way to win,not a 120 to lose....yea? Life still goes on....

oh ya...i gathered my Taiwan pics already...will be posting up soon....